I'm posting this here because maybe someone in this forum knows who I'm talking about and can let him know that his dog is out of control.
I was fishing one of my favorite holes on the Colorado during an amazing prince nymph hatch when this guy in a bright orange boat that looks like a fucking Rubber Pumpkin(trademark pending) comes floating by. His dog jumps out of the boat right into my hole of rising trout and preceeds to take a giant Aqua Dump right where I'm fishing. Needless to say the fishing is shot and now I have a floating turd that floats right past me a rubs against the entire side of my boat. This guy calls his dog while I'm yelling at him and blowing my meat whistle and screaming about the 3 foot long shit stain thats now on the side of my boat. I'm fuckin pissed so I get in my boat to try to catch the guy but he's rowing so damn fast that I can't catch up to him. When I got out of the river and told the rangers at the takeout that I wanted to press charges for Aqua Dumping and shit valadalism but they said that I would need to find the culpret and take the matter into my own hands. This guy ought to leave him dog tied to a tree while he floats to keep it from shitting in the river everywhere like a responsible boater. I can't wait to see his boat wrapped on a rock or pylon somewhere so I can take a big dump on it, but chances are I won't because I only float Class 2 shit. So if you a Rubber Pumpkin stuck in the river please post so I can go take a shit on the boat before they rescue it.
So if you knowthe Rubber Pumpkin Pirate and Aqua Dumping Dog let him know the guy in the upsidedown Otter with Poop Pinstripping is on the hunt for him. Also does anyone know how to get shit stains off your hypalon because my boat cleaner wouldn't get it all off. I tried scrubbing it with my toothbrush but that just worked it into the creases and made my mornings not so minty fresh.