It has come to my attention......re: Laterals - Mountain Buzz
 

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Old 07-22-2011   #1
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Bellevue, Idaho
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It has come to my attention......re: Laterals

It has come to my attention upon viewing several videos lately (which, while frightening, yielded some great shit shows), that there are quite a few folks that don't know what a lateral is, how to recognize one and the appropriate preventative measures to take to successful move through them or over them.

Do's:
Square up to them.
Be rotating into them.
Pushing with your oars toward the lateral.
Pulling with your oars toward the lateral if stern first.
Have paddles lean into or toward the lateral.
Look for laterals to be at different angle to the banks of the river.
Try to identify the river feature that is creating the lateral.
The earlier the better as then you can draw a line from the feature to the meat of the lateral to better identify the angle you should be.
Put down the beer so you can row with both hands.

Don'ts;
Go sideways right before you hit them.
-----Unless your mother in law is on that side and you wish to teach her to never boat with you again.
Pull back right before hitting one. Sideways.
Drink while going through one. If you must use both hands as a boat unguided will usually do better than one poorly guided or rowed.
Scream: "Here comes the cracker wave" just before you hit it. Sideways.
Blame your paddlers.
Blame your popped oar.

This has been a PSA from A.H.O.L.E. - Advocates for Hole Or Lateral Education.

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Old 07-22-2011   #2
 
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Somebody had to say it...
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Old 07-22-2011   #3
 
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Whew. Thank you.
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Old 07-22-2011   #4
 
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Jerry - thanks. I think you could make good $$ with laminated card folks can order with that info. Sell them at raft shops or on the internet...
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Old 07-22-2011   #5
 
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But, if we follow all your instructions, you won't have any great shit-shows to watch!

There's nothing more educational than doing something wrong.
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Old 07-22-2011   #6
 
Casper, Wyoming
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Quote:
Originally Posted by earthNRG View Post
But, if we follow all your instructions, you won't have any great shit-shows to watch!

There's nothing more educational than doing something wrong.

Comment of the day!
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Old 07-22-2011   #7
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Carvedog scores again!
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Old 07-22-2011   #8
 
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F'in funnel!!! Hehehe. Good stuff!
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Old 07-22-2011   #9
 
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Durango, Colorado
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Quote:
Originally Posted by carvedog View Post

Do's:
...
Chug down the beer so you can row with both hands.

This has been a PSA from A.H.O.L.E. - Advocates for Hole Or Lateral Education.
Fixed your post.
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