Epic Fails- Grand Canyon or otherwise - Mountain Buzz
 



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Old 11-03-2012   #1
 
Aurora, Colorado
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Epic Fails- Grand Canyon or otherwise

Alright, I've read tons of the "what's the best. . ." campsite, hike, layover spot, piece of gear that you wouldn't think of for the Grand Canyon threads. Now let's hear your worst gear fail, the worst campsite you've stayed at, the worst epic bushwhacking-for-nothing hike, the worst "doh!" moment that you'd probably rather not remind yourself of. Non-Grand Canyon posts welcome, as well. Remember, none of these Buzzards will judge you!!

Years ago, on day one of a 4 day Yampa trip a buddy in a kayak floated up to me, stole an oar blade, and hucked it. It sank. He turned, shocked, and said, "Those float, right??" 1/4 oars down. Day two, I dipped my downstream oar too low- 2 down, 2 to go. Day three, instant karma after talking shit about the way someone was rowing, I put my right tube and frame under an undercut wall. Bent the steel frame, sheared off the thole pin, and unbeknownst to me, tore through 90% of the hose clamp that held the clip on that right oar. Next day, last day, at the back of the pack, the hose clamps broke the rest of the way. 3 down. No spares left on me. No one's hearing my whistle. Finally caught up, spinning around in circles with one oar. Got another oar from somebody else. 20 minutes from the takeout, not knowing you ought not go right at Inglesby, you guessed it- flipped off the big rock. Pretty humbling trip that taught me a lot- Don't let kayakers near your boat, don't talk shit, or the river gods will shit on you, watch your downstream oar (already knew that one, evidently not well enough), and for the love of God, don't go right at Inglesby!!

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Old 11-03-2012   #2
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by climbdenali View Post
Alright, I've read tons of the "what's the best. . ." campsite, hike, layover spot, piece of gear that you wouldn't think of for the Grand Canyon threads. Now let's hear your worst gear fail, the worst campsite you've stayed at, the worst epic bushwhacking-for-nothing hike, the worst "doh!" moment that you'd probably rather not remind yourself of. Non-Grand Canyon posts welcome, as well. Remember, none of these Buzzards will judge you!!

Years ago, on day one of a 4 day Yampa trip a buddy in a kayak floated up to me, stole an oar blade, and hucked it. It sank. He turned, shocked, and said, "Those float, right??" 1/4 oars down. Day two, I dipped my downstream oar too low- 2 down, 2 to go. Day three, instant karma after talking shit about the way someone was rowing, I put my right tube and frame under an undercut wall. Bent the steel frame, sheared off the thole pin, and unbeknownst to me, tore through 90% of the hose clamp that held the clip on that right oar. Next day, last day, at the back of the pack, the hose clamps broke the rest of the way. 3 down. No spares left on me. No one's hearing my whistle. Finally caught up, spinning around in circles with one oar. Got another oar from somebody else. 20 minutes from the takeout, not knowing you ought not go right at Inglesby, you guessed it- flipped off the big rock. Pretty humbling trip that taught me a lot- Don't let kayakers near your boat, don't talk shit, or the river gods will shit on you, watch your downstream oar (already knew that one, evidently not well enough), and for the love of God, don't go right at Inglesby!!
First run down the Green, I went right at Inglesby and pinned my cat with my 10 year old daughter. We climbed on the rock and jumped off the backside into the eddy, boat came free. I have made it a point to ALWAYS go right since then, but just paying more attention. Maybe 15 right runs, only a problem the first time.
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Old 11-03-2012   #3
 
Aurora, Colorado
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I had wanted to go right at Inglesby the next time down, but the wind was crazy from right to left, plus the wife was about to get physically violent if I tried to take her right again. . .
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Old 11-03-2012   #4
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couple years ago i was guiding on the futa. standard practice at terminator rapid is to run the 1st third of the rapid, eddy left, and scout your line for the bottom of the rapid. i botched the eddy. the safety cat was low in the eddy as the paddle crew and i tried to scramble in, we bounced into him. while facing upstream my right oar went over top of the safety cat, and his oar was over my frame. we were sort of locked together and floating backwards into the rest of the rapid.

i spun my boat counter-clockwise with my left oar to get free, realized we definitely were not going to scout on this particular day, and the safety was behind us. then i broke my left oar into 3 pieces against a boulder, and had to throw the jagged spear in my hand into the river. i said something like, "get the fuck down," we spun through the rest of the rapid somehow without flipping, as i tried to maneuver with one oar.

we barely caught the eddy before Son of terminator. i was embarrassed. terrible line, poor recovery, safety behind us. the futa let me get away with that one.
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Old 11-03-2012   #5
 
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rowing the whiterock stretch of rio grande in low water. hotter than bejeebus. get stuck on sandbar, get out pull huge gear boat off and back into current, wind blows me back upstream on same sandbar....
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Old 11-03-2012   #6
 
BV, CO
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Originally Posted by tango View Post
couple years ago i was guiding on the futa. standard practice at terminator rapid is to run the 1st third of the rapid, eddy left, and scout your line for the bottom of the rapid. i botched the eddy. the safety cat was low in the eddy as the paddle crew and i tried to scramble in, we bounced into him. while facing upstream my right oar went over top of the safety cat, and his oar was over my frame. we were sort of locked together and floating backwards into the rest of the rapid.

i spun my boat counter-clockwise with my left oar to get free, realized we definitely were not going to scout on this particular day, and the safety was behind us. then i broke my left oar into 3 pieces against a boulder, and had to throw the jagged spear in my hand into the river. i said something like, "get the fuck down," we spun through the rest of the rapid somehow without flipping, as i tried to maneuver with one oar.

we barely caught the eddy before Son of terminator. i was embarrassed. terrible line, poor recovery, safety behind us. the futa let me get away with that one.
Ouch! As I recall that eddy is backed up by a scary boulder with a lot of water running under it.
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Old 11-03-2012   #7
 
Aurora, Colorado
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rowing the whiterock stretch of rio grande in low water. hotter than bejeebus. get stuck on sandbar, get out pull huge gear boat off and back into current, wind blows me back upstream on same sandbar....
Doh!! Mama said there'd be days like this. . .
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Old 11-03-2012   #8
 
dillon, Colorado
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Originally Posted by climbdenali View Post
I had wanted to go right at Inglesby the next time down, but the wind was crazy from right to left, plus the wife was about to get physically violent if I tried to take her right again. . .
Well considering how the first time went We miss you guys...come up and hang out sometime
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Old 11-03-2012   #9
 
Aurora, Colorado
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You should come down here! Still water, and it was boating weather today. We'll go for a fishin' trip. We've got an extra room for you guys . . .
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Old 11-04-2012   #10
 
Oakland, California
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Great Topic and I'm laughing out loud as I read these. I've had so many epic fails on river trips I don't know where to begin. I was TL and chief food packer for a 4 day Dolores trip for 20 people and forgot coffee. Yeah...forgot coffee. I got to redeem myself the next year as TL/Chief Gear Man for a 20 person Stillwater Canyon trip and forgot toiler paper for everyone. Nice!

Anybody wanna go on a trip with me? I swear I got us covered.
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