CO. Boaters at Gauley! - Mountain Buzz
 



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Old 09-10-2007   #1
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
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CO. Boaters at Gauley!

So word on the street is that a group of wanabe kayakers are headed out to the real coast for some Yough/Gauley time. Well all i have to say is that it had better not be a junk show. I know you guys only get to paddle three monthes out of the year so you had better check your tity whities before heading out this way. I don't want to spend my Gauley season picking up gear that you posers leave after your countless yard sales. Lets try and keep the damage to a minimum this year. Oh, and to that fruit bag Joe Keck, don't even think about bringing a play boat to these rivers cause they are way out of your league. Your best bet is to stay back at the take out and keep my beers cold and have a sandwich waiting. Better yet, you can have that chick your traveling with brush up on her massage techniques couse i will be pretty sore after dropping loops and blunts on all you "creek boaters". See ya in a couple of weeks.

ES

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Old 09-11-2007   #2
 
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Lyons, Colorado
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You have officially been challenged to a Shot Gunnin Contest
(or syrup guzzilin) you choose........
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Old 09-11-2007   #3
 
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ES who?

Who is ES anyway?
Expert Swimmer, Early Swimmer, Eddy Swimmer, Eat Shitter, Eastern Spanker, Eventual Sinker?... Help me out here guys.

-d
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Old 09-11-2007   #4
 
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First off, Booths reply is perfect. Matt is obviously stoked up for get hammered! I love it.

The day you need to take anything beyond a playboat down Upper Gauley is the day you need to start doing the Lower.

That being said, we are stoked for some deep water! I am so pumped up, I couldn't sleep last night. Head'n out tomorrow and will be at the Gauley/Potomac/Yough for about 2 1/2 weeks.
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Old 09-11-2007   #5
 
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Erection Sucker?

-d
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Old 09-11-2007   #6
 
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ES, please be in good shape for my arrival. I don't like waiting for my gear deliveries.
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Old 09-11-2007   #7
 
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Good point T, Oh, and once you gather all the gear, feel free to carry it up the hill to the car if you would.
-d
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Old 09-11-2007   #8
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
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Not me

I hope your not talking about me, as I am an expert kayaker. Just check out my extreme instructional video at grabyournuts.com. By the way I'll have my RV at Gauley and a mechanical bull on Saturday night at the venue grounds. Come by for some free swag and a chance to win $500 on the bull.

GRAB YOUR NUTS IT'S GO TIME!
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Old 09-11-2007   #9
 
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Now, that's how to self-promote. Take notice, Norquist.
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Old 09-13-2007   #10
 
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Oh, it's on like Donkey Kong! We're coming to wreck your entire state. When we leave the summersville dam will be in ruins, friendsville burnt to the ground and we'll get rid of George after wave wheeling the Great Falls on Monday afternoon. I bet you'll be dropping some sic loops and blunts as it hasn't rained on the ridiculous coast in a year. I'm sure hell hole has taught you boys a thing or two as it's the only game in town. We may only have three months of goods, but the Green doesn't even run anymore on your block. I would drop some lines about your ladies in return, but they're not even worth looking at much writing about, so we're bringin our own from CO. In regards to our ladies, you can drop your best lines. Unfortunately, our ladies run the shit, drop the beer bongs, and remain drop dead gorgeous. Thus, they're far out of your sheep huntin', Deliverance watching league. I'm only rocking back east because the Mank Crew has been getting it done so hard for months now and we need a warm sauna (the gauley) to relax our rock hard pecs.

Joe
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