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Old 11-14-2015   #21
caverdan's Avatar
C. Springs, Colorado
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,443
Good judgement sometimes comes from a bad experience that started with bad judgement. Sometimes it's hard to say no.....but with gets easier.

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Old 11-14-2015   #22
Salida, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1986
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 728
I've loaned stuff that disappeared, but was replaced in the end. Several friends involved stepped up to replace something that one bonehead lost. So be careful not to penalize other worthy friends who may want to borrow stuff in the future, as you may need to borrow something sometime too. One knucklehead buddy who may end up coming around in the end doesn't mean all friends are that way.

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Old 11-14-2015   #23
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Dundee, Oregon
Paddling Since: 1989
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 655
It was very nice of you to loan the gear out in the first place. I loan gear and my boat now and again, but to a small circle of people I have known for a long time. I'd be pretty upset as you are as well.
I think one thing that hasn't been addressed is respect and integrity. You did him a huge favor loaning gear for a huge trip like that, and many people have agreed with you that your gear should have been returned clean, and whatever was broken replaced or repaired as you saw fit.
You made the statement that your friendship is on the line at this point, but be careful how much pressure you put on yourself. If your friend isn't willing to make this right, then he really isn't your friend. As long as you are reasonably respectful, you have every right to tell him what is wrong with this picture. You can tell him that you had an expectation that the gear would be returned as clean as when he took it, and that broken/ missing items would be repaired or replaced as you saw fit. Tell him it upset you that things haven't been dealt with the way you would have liked. Tell him you enjoyed the idea of helping a friend, but now you are in this position of having to deal with a mess that he made.
If he doesn't respond well to this, or doesn't want to fix his poor behavior, you didn't have a friend to begin with. I have friends I have fought with and disagreed with, and still disagree with, but we still have a level of respect for each other. We need to be able to tell our friends like it is. I have written supposed friends like that off before as well, I can say I've been in your shoes. You don't need friends like that.
Wishing I was on the river instead of surfing the web...
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Old 11-14-2015   #24
Pinecliffe, Colorado
Paddling Since: 05
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 447
Originally Posted by bucketboater View Post
Your friend is a jerk for even asking to borrow gear for 3 weeks. That's too much to ask a friend for. You're the bad guy if you say no and if you say yes your gear is going to get beat to shit for 3 freakin weeks. He owes you $500. That's less then half the price he would of paid if he rented.
I agree what kind of ahole puts it on someone to ask to borrow their boat for a 3 week grand trip. I'd be reluctant to ask someone to even borrow their stove.
The road to Hell is paved with good intentions. KARL MARX
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Old 11-14-2015   #25
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 332
I have loaned and borrowed countless pieces of gear and boats. Needless to say I return borrowed gear as good if not better than when it left the owners house. I have sent out many thousands of dollars worth of gear to a variety of people. Some people are greatful and some bring gear back abused. Those that show respect and appreciate your gear and effort are true friends. Those that don't rarley and a second chance to borrow gear. I am always happy to help out good peeps. As the old saying goes, fool me one...

Hope your buddy comes through in the end.
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Old 11-14-2015   #26
seattle, Washington
Paddling Since: 90
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 355
Originally Posted by treemanji View Post
I agree what kind of ahole puts it on someone to ask to borrow their boat for a 3 week grand trip. I'd be reluctant to ask someone to even borrow their stove.
I'd let a friend borrow a table,fire pan etc. but my raft for 3 weeks, kick rocks. Where do you draw the line? Your truck for a 3 week road trip or your wife for a weekend in Vegas. The canyon is lifetime experience that puts a lifetime of abuse on a boat. I've seen levels come up a few CFS overnight and wear holes in boats. Rent a boat if you don't have one and run it like its stolen is the only option i.m.o.
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Old 11-15-2015   #27
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Evergreen, Colorado
Paddling Since: '92
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 347
I boat with a lot of folk I love and trust my life with. The list of whom I would loan my whole row rig set up to is extremely small. My multi day trips involve maximum fun and I would expect my friends to all be rolling the same way. That being said, shit happens. I would just rather avoid the whole "lost this" or "Dude, it just broke" conversation. Outfittters rent sweet rental rigs.
"We're gonna need a bigger boat"
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Old 11-15-2015   #28
Woodland Park, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1999
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 127
Hands down he owes you an invite on the next hard to get permitted trip.
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Old 11-15-2015   #29
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Fraser, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2000
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 1,047
Lent a friend my werner kayak paddle once, it got a chip in the blade, he told me about it,
apolagised, and got me a 6 pack of blue paddle( ha, ha) made sure i was happy with the restitution. I was not at all mad, and happy to lend him gear in the future, because of how he handled it.
Think of me what you will, I got a little space to fill.
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Old 11-15-2015   #30
Colorado Plateau Metropolis, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2006
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 42
I loaned my nicer boat to a friend this summer, so he could entertain his new girlfriend on the moab daily. We counted the straps together, and made sure he had the minimum amount of gear to keep track of.

Needless to say, he sent me pictures of him on the boat, with my cooler in the wrong place, so the swiveling chair kept scaring up the cooler. Permanent straps that I keep on the frame had been taken off and attached in different places. Some other things here and there that had me cursing my friends name, that were really not that big of a deal.

I learned a few lessons about how to loan gear in the future. I would still even loan gear to this friend, but I may be a little more precise about what I expect to be returned to me at the end of the day.

Loaning a friend a boat for the Grand. Man, you are a pretty cool friend. I hope he realizes it, and respects it.

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