Dildo Rock + Noah's Ark = WTF - Page 9 - Mountain Buzz
 



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Old 10-07-2016   #81
 
San Jose, CA, California
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It is all about the intelligent design!!! Soon the boats will be self-directed by a higher power freeing the guide to preach the gospel to all passengers during the rafting portion of all trips.

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Old 10-07-2016   #82
 
Flagstaff, Arizona
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Being critical of ding bat guides or even a company is fine by me. I've been around the Ark just enough to pick up on NA's reputation. In my view there are odd ball green horn guides all over the Arkansas, with many looking like they might just drop the next domer sideways. Picking on a group of people because of their religion a low form of humor that I'm calling BS on. There's truth in every joke. I don't see the need for religion or politics in a thread about ignorant river guide behavior.


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Old 10-07-2016   #83
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I agree with the posters who suggested they crashed because they didn't kneel before the Dark Prince. They chose to ride the Devil's Backbone and he spared them, but kept their little toy!
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Old 10-07-2016   #84
 
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Belgrade, Montana
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jmacn View Post
I don't see the need for religion or politics in a thread about ignorant river guide behavior.


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But it's either politics or religion that is responsible for their ignorance... At least that's what the media tells me.
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Old 10-07-2016   #85
 
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Sylva, Western North Carolina
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Originally Posted by Randaddy View Post
I agree with the posters who suggested they crashed because they didn't kneel before the Dark Prince. They chose to ride the Devil's Backbone and he spared them, but kept their little toy!

You can make the analogy to snake handling churches...if you get bit your faith wasn't strong enough.

Perhaps their faith wasn't strong enough to carry them around the dildo and they got penetrated for it. Perhaps their god was punishing them for any sins they committed on their WV pilgrimage.

Or maybe just bad guiding...


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Old 10-07-2016   #86
 
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Sylva, Western North Carolina
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Dildo Rock + Noah's Ark = WTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by jmacn View Post
Picking on a group of people because of their religion a low form of humor that I'm calling BS on. There's truth in every joke. I don't see the need for religion or politics in a thread about ignorant river guide behavior.

I'm not too sure about that...having grown up in and currently living in the Bible Belt, I find it quite necessary to call BS on religion and some of those who practice it, frequently. Many who claim to be religious often hold themselves up as better than those of us who are not. There is a certain guilty pleasure in seeing groups like this screw up in a public manner. Much like reading about an anti-gay pastor getting caught with a male prostitute.

That being said, I'm glad NA puts their faith based principles up front. Some people need that, I do not, but support the rights of those who. I would not want to accidentally land on a commercial trip and have the guide minister to me. It would spoil my experience.

The rivers and mountains are my "church". I do not need religion to appreciate them. I'm fairly certain I'm not the only one who feels that way.

I hope everyone has a good weekend and gets out on some rivers. I'm working this weekend, saving lives and stomping out disease in the Bible Belt. Be safe out there.


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Old 10-07-2016   #87
 
Canon City, Colorado
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Originally Posted by elkhaven View Post
Have you ever thought that simply rafting/kayaking is an unnecessarily risky behavior
Bingo. Rafting isn't a necessary activity, so it's probably too risky for Bill.


And as to the BASE comparison, some numbers to think about:

1 in 60 The annual odds of being killed in a BASE jumping accident.*
1 in 100,000 The annual odds of being killed whitewater rafting.**
3 in 100,000 The annual odds of being killed doing some type of whitewater boating.***

That means that you're more than 1600 times more likely to die BASE jumping than rafting.



* Parachuting from fixed objects: descriptive study of 106 fatal events in BASE jumping 1981€“2006 -- Westman et al. 42 (6): 431 -- British Journal of Sports Medicine

** Exactly How Much Danger Is There When You White Water Raft? | Manawatu, New Zealand

*** https://www.americanwhitewater.org/c...rticleid/1614/
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Old 10-07-2016   #88
 
Flagstaff, Arizona
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I can't help but wonder if we would be poking fun at Jewish, Hindu, or Muslim river guides in this forum? Is it because we're from a historically Christian culture that we feel entitled to mock these guides beyond their on river shortcomings? Picking on NA for what is obviously their lifestyle is lame. That's my point. They call themselves Noah's Ark. They aren't hiding it. Clearly they appeal to certain clients and I assume they're proud of their religious community. More power to them. I don't go to any church besides the mountains & rivers. I'm not trying to climb on any soapbox here or take a silly thread too seriously. I care about the river community & like it or not, NA is a part of the community. Just because someone is an easy target doesn't justify taking the shot...


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Old 10-08-2016   #89
 
Denver, Colorado
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Noahs Masterpiece X2

I was there to see the awesomness that can now be referred to as the Noah's 2016 Gauley Sh!tshow. I also saw the kids from Washington in 2015 wrap their boat on dildo and Noah's surpassed that sh!tshow. If you don't know, Noah's also wrapped a boat the next day in Lost Paddle (Tumble Home). I understand rookies can get too big for their britches but it seems these guides need more training regularly. So you wrapped a boat on dildo, it can happen. But to wrap a SECOND boat the next day? Come on guys. That's not even my point though. The second boat was left unattended. When the water came down the boat released. When the water began to rise the boat went down stream. Fortunately, it was found in a safe place and put on a rock. But what if that boat blocked a slot needed by other boaters? Why was this boat left unattended? That is my issue with the Noah's 2016 Gauley Sh!tshow. I Nevertheless, I am glad everyone was safe AND I love a good show with whistles of celebration!
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Old 10-08-2016   #90
 
Denver, Colorado
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jmacn View Post
I can't help but wonder if we would be poking fun at Jewish, Hindu, or Muslim river guides in this forum? Is it because we're from a historically Christian culture that we feel entitled to mock these guides beyond their on river shortcomings? Picking on NA for what is obviously their lifestyle is lame. That's my point. They call themselves Noah's Ark. They aren't hiding it. Clearly they appeal to certain clients and I assume they're proud of their religious community. More power to them. I don't go to any church besides the mountains & rivers. I'm not trying to climb on any soapbox here or take a silly thread too seriously. I care about the river community & like it or not, NA is a part of the community. Just because someone is an easy target doesn't justify taking the shot...


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No, we could not. In today's society saying those things would be considered a hate crime. Truth.
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