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Old 05-22-2009   #1
cheercoachjodi@aol.com's Avatar
Durango, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2008
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3
Is this safe or stupid?? I need your advise

I've been rafting with my friends for a over a year now. Most of my close friends are dudes and they are the ones that take me rafting. I don't own my own boat, but I try to be one hell of a bow betty so that I "bring something to the table", right? I've only been rafting a year, but I've done some amazing trips in that year (the grand, deso, westwater, arkansas, yampa, dolores).
Here's my dilemma, all my close guy friends are now getting +1s aka girlfriends. Although I'm happy for them, I'm starting to see that my normal spot on trips might be filled by their +1. My question is...is it a stupid idea to try to join trips on websites like mountainbuzz and other sites like it? I don't want to be the Natalie Holloway of rafting, but I love rafting and don't want to give up on it just because I can't buy my own boat right now. What do you think ladies???

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Old 05-22-2009   #2
TakemetotheRiver's Avatar
Durango, Colorado
Paddling Since: 05
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,477
I joined MtnBuzz 2 years ago for this purpose exactly. None of my friends could get the time off to go rafting or didn't care to go in the winter or whatever. My first trip I planned on the Buzz in Nov. of 07- Westwater for Thanksgiving. When I showed up at the putin I was the only girl and I had only met 1 of the other people because he was from Durango. Everyone was great and we had a fantastic time. I've boated with most of them since then.

The 2nd trip was a February Salt trip- again, I knew only one other person when I got to the putin and again the trip was awesome.

I've done probably 2 dozen trips since then with Buzzards I didn't know before and have made some great friends and had perfect trips. I essentially expanded my boating circle tenfold with the Buzz and haven't had any problems with it.

Having said that, I can see reasons to be concerned. I am very laid back, not easily offended, and spend most of my time around guys anyway. I also have my own boat- so I'm not dependent on someone else.

The best thing is that now that I've been here awhile, when I get invited on trips I can always get a little background on the TL from other Buzzards whom I trust. You have to assess the risks and your willingness to accept those risks- boaters are among the best people I've ever met, but there are always bad apples in every group. Be smart, but I think the Buzz is a pretty safe place to plan trips.

Also, come along on our girl trips- I don't mind a bowflower in my boat!

"There is NOTHING--absolute nothing--half so much worth doing as simply messing about in boats. Look here! If you've really nothing else on hand this morning, supposing we drop down the river together, and have a long day of it?" -Wind in the Willows
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Old 05-22-2009   #3
rivermanryan's Avatar
Durango, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1999
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 580
One of my best multi-day trips of all time was a collection of buzzards and random people from random places!
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Old 05-22-2009   #4
lhowemt's Avatar
at my house, Montana
Paddling Since: 2020
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,346
Hi- Interesting question. I'm a bit skeptical since this is your first post, that this is a real post. Regardless, I'll jump in. My first statement might give you an idea, but a woman has to be careful out there. I find it strange that you've been boating with friends, and not met others that you might boat with? And the only reason I'd think of that the new girlfriends wouldn't want "you" around is if you've been doing more than boating with the guys. So why the "cold call" on the Buzz? Assuming you're NOT a troll (we've had plenty of them lately), here's what I think

Doing so can go very well, or not so well. I got on a grand trip this way, and asked around a lot of people for advice. I heard horror stories, and good stories. My grand trip overall went very well, and I can't wait to get back, but I learned a lot about asking more and better questions, and trying to see through the stories people say. You might end up on a great trip, with people you'd love to boat with, and you may not. Here's what i'd watch out for: the usual "we want a woman for BALANCE". I think that's bullshit, we had one of those guys, and he wasn't looking for balance, unless balance has new meaning. Also "We don't really drink much". Now I don't drink at all anymore, and don't mind people that do, but I'd rather hear someone tell me they like to booze on the river (I used to rather quite a lot) than pretend they just like a "couple". It's hard to tell, but people that hide what they do usually do WAY more than they say they do. If you're not hiding anything, just say you like to drink on the river, in camp, whatever. It's not that big a deal.

Long story short, I still hook up with boaters that I don't know for trips. I have one coming up in less than a month. I can't explain why I'm comfortable with it, but I am. I think my "creep-dar" has been recalibrated, and I'm leery of great stories about how mellow, fun, blah, blah, blah they are. I also watch out for people that are overly nice on-line (may sound weird). What kind of person never has some shit or strong things to say on a forum? A fake one putting on a face to get women on their trips, or to get on other people's trips. We're all real on the river, let's let ourselves known before we get there so we can make sure we're compatible.

So good luck, network locally, and boat regionally. Ultimately I've met quite a few great people on other forums (the Buzz being so far from my home), and it's working out great. Just be cautious, and take care of yourself. Honestly, one woman told me of a grand trip where she woke up and some guy was wacking off over her. Freaking crazy, but she also made many good friends through internet groups and trips.

Time to go boating, feel free to PM me if you want to discuss further.
I am a river, babe - I've got plenty of time, I don't know where I'm going, I'm just following the lines..... - "We are water" by Shaye
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Old 05-22-2009   #5
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 254
my 2

don't feel that you need others to get out there...forget about needing a thousand plus dollar raft..

plenty of rivers can be run without this kind of expense...

buy yourself a used duckie or kayak, and liberate yourself from the need for someone else's boat.

you'll have more fun, be more confident, and get more river action.

seems like you can get a whole setup for near 500$ used.

rafts are great, and ideal for float trips, but can be a big barrier to getting on the river too. simplify!

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Old 05-22-2009   #6
pnw, Washington
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 3,404
I don't want to be the Natalie Holloway of rafting, but I love rafting and don't want to give up on it just because I can't buy my own boat right now.
I know its dark humor but this was seriously funny.
"Yesterday I was clever and tried to change the world. Today I am wise and try to change myself." -Rumi
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Old 05-22-2009   #7
God Amongst Men
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Phuoc My, Da Nang, THE 'NAM
Paddling Since: 1845
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,988
it sounds like you need to talk to this guy:

Desolation Canyon spot available
"Don't f$&@ing eddy out, just run it! Whaddya doin??" -LMyers
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Old 05-22-2009   #8
cheercoachjodi@aol.com's Avatar
Durango, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2008
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3
THAT guy is exactly what I'm afraid of
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Old 05-22-2009   #9
caspermike's Avatar
Bozeman, Montana
Paddling Since: 1999
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 5,507
good luck.... theirs some boaters who you deffentely don't want to be in a boat with... i suggest get your own and get after it... than you can go where you want... theres some cheap kayaks you can pick up at gear swaps and somepeople give them away for nothing... speaking of. used rainbow pyrahna micro 240.. its a classic somebody has to want it... and i don't really want to get rid of it but kingpin icon 6.2 bathtub addition with tripple oil canning... (it helps slow you down on waves so you can get up high and drop in, custom designed.) free... free....
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Old 05-22-2009   #10
God Amongst Men
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Originally Posted by cheercoachjodi@aol.com View Post
THAT guy is exactly what I'm afraid of
ha ha ha ha ha glad to hear you've got SOME sense at least

nah, you don't need to worry about your problem. like Steve said, I would suggest getting your own individual boat, whether it be a kayak or a duck or a fish cat or a full blown raft, having your own boat is a freedom that allows you to go with anyone, anywhere. plus you dont have to rely on other folks bailing out, or having to come up with someone else to go in order to boat. the more you get out there and boat the more river folk you will run into, and finding folks is not a problem. just be as friendly as possible to other boaters at the put ins and takeouts, because that is where you make long lasting boater relationships, NOT on a creepy moonlit night in Deso. you may not get to go with your friends as much, but at the very least dont completely shun them- going with them once in a while is still better than not going at all. plus with your own boat, you can go with their "+1" and not be in the way; youre simply another paddler on the trip. durango has lots of good folks in it, im sure its not hard to find good companions there.

as far as meeting people on the buzz, i have met nothing but damn decent folk when arranging a real life excursion. most people on here sound like crustied angry river folk but get us out there and we're some of the best people you've ever met. if someone has one post to their name and advertises for a trip looking for "romance", id probably pass, but if someone like TakeMe offered you a spot on a trip with some of her friends, ten to one its going to be a damn good time. just use your judgement and get your own boat and your horizons will be limitless!

"Don't f$&@ing eddy out, just run it! Whaddya doin??" -LMyers
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