I Know What Happened to Michael Jackson
After Farrah Fawcett died, having atoned for her sins she ascended to heaven. Upon reaching the pearly gates, St. Peter welcomed her in with a wide, pleasant smile and said "we've been waiting for you". After some small talk, St. Peter told her "here, let me take you to see God, he's a huge fan".
Farah and St. Peter walked onto the other side of that particular cloud and found God sitting in his huge God-Chair. God welcomed Farrah in his raspy booming voice, saying "Farrah, I've watched with pride at what you did on earth with the gifts I gave you". Few of my creations have so pleased me during the time they were given. Farrah and God chatted for a while, about this and that.
Finally God had some other business to attend to, but before Farrah left he asked "Farrah, let me know if there is anything I can do to help you adjust to life in Heaven". Farrah answered "God, I'm worried about my children on Earth, and that worry is really destroying my heaven experience right now". God said "I'll look into it". POOF Michael Jackson dropped dead.