Front Range Tacos: Taco Don!
Well folks, there is TWO personal threats from someone who is considered a PILLAR in the kayaking community. If I was Confluence Kayak Supply I would want his old, threatening little boys, sorry ass selling gear in my shop! That's for sure. Nice Website by the way! Not! Have I made any personal threats? Now you see why this sport is fucked from the very hypocritical foundation on which it rests.
Don, please come to the Western slope and bring an extra large order of "Front Range Tacos" with your famous extra extra weak sauce! Oh yeah, add one bitch slap with extra sting to my order. That's right you heard it here first,"Front Range Taco", it describes your core image so well that you have been automatically selected from thousands of your kind to be the new FRT President.
This position will require you to keep up the good work in acting like a Pro Front Range Taco but you may need to come up with a new and special "weak sauce" recipe to keep up with your competition. The new recipe should include: A generous helping of Jealousy, Some crustys from your depends and mix it in a 2/3 ratio of temporary. So I can't wait to see you and hopefully soon so we can talk about your exciting new position and what you can do to become more of a douche bag.
Congratulations and long live the FRT's!
You will never forget me and that is what you hate.
P.S. I thought Front Rangers had a slight sense of humor but I guess they are just a bunch of mountain clogging, carpet walking, pencil pushing yuppies after all!
P.S.S A huge shout out to all my hardcore badass sponsors( Esp. Dagger and NRS) that bowed down like a bunch of Front Range Tacos and took it in the ass from all you folks that make up the awesome internet sport of shityaking. I want to give personal shout out to everyone of you that has helped to make my life that much more entertaining, thanks!