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Old 12-05-2006   #21
Georgia Moonshine
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 173
Marko? U. of Washington was my bet.
U. of Wisconsin makes perfect sense for Basil


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Old 12-11-2006   #22
Georgia Moonshine
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 173,_part_i

Not a bastion of PC thought? How can a University exist that does this??

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Old 12-13-2006   #23
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Golden, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1984
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,879
Warning! Soy makes you gay:

From WorldNet Daily:

Soy is feminizing, and commonly leads to a decrease in the size of the penis, sexual confusion and homosexuality. That's why most of the medical (not socio-spiritual) blame for today's rise in homosexuality must fall upon the rise in soy formula and other soy products.

Luckily I switched back to milk awhile ago, or I might have had to post this via interpretive dance. WorldNet will soon become my main source for insightful facts and information.
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Old 12-13-2006   #24
Georgia Moonshine
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Fair Tax Essay:

The fair tax would also eliminate subsidies to those dastardly soy farmers!
Soy ruined Falco, you could be next.
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Old 12-17-2006   #25
El Flaco's Avatar
Golden, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1984
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,879
For the non-brainwashed:

Bush Critics You Should Trust
A guide to the conservatives and Republicans who have turned on the president.

An excellent conservative view of the Bush Doctrine:
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Old 12-19-2006   #26
Andy H.'s Avatar
Wheat Ridge, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1995
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 2,909
A friend sent this little Christmas spoof to me:
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& &&

An Overdue Visit

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the nation
Friends of Freedom knew it was a special occasion.
Lady Liberty stood taller just off the shore
Her torch shining brighter than a few weeks before

But it wasn't the flame turning her cheeks all rosy It was thoughts of
Snowe, Feingold and Nancy Pelosi
And leaders from every side of the aisle
Who would soon bring the Bill of Rights back into style.

The Amendments had all hurried out of their beds –
Which was no easy task, they were nearly in shreds –
And they rushed to the window on papery feet
As a jolly old man flew right over their street.

"Could it be!?" they inquired as the roof shook and trembled
And they crept toward the mantle, peaceably assembled,
Just as someone emerged from the chimney with flair
In a shiny red suit, with a shock of white hair

And a top hat, and pants all in red, white and blue –
"Wait a minute," the Amendments exclaimed, "Who are you?"
"Don't be frightened my children," he said, "it's no scam.
"You can't have forgotten your old Uncle Sam!"

"Holy crap!" said Free Speech. "Stop right there!" yelled Bear Arms
And Privacy cried "Who shut off the alarms?!"
The Fifth remained silent, but Uncle Sam said
"We've been having some trouble, but Freedom's not dead."

The Amendments were cautious. "It's just been so long
"We've seen Liberty lost, we've seen so much go wrong.
"The President's trying to mangle and warp us,
"The Fourth is in tatters, so's Habeas Corpus!"

The old man sat down - he had had quite a ride –
But he told them "Don't worry, the Law's on our side,
"'Cause the nation's fed up and more people are crying
"For Justice and an end to illegal spying,

"And secret abductions by the CIA,
"And laws that would take women's choices away,
"And Gitmo tribunals and secret detention,
"And other intrusions too numerous to mention

"Not so fast," said a grinchity voice from above
And Don Rumsfeld pushed past the Fourteenth with a shove.
He was covered in soot and he looked kind of scary.
It seemed like his Christmas had not been so merry.

The Amendments said they weren't happy to see him:
"You tried to throw all of us in the museum!
"You've done so much the Constitution forbids!"
"And I would have gone on, but for you meddling kids!"

Uncle Sam told him "Rummy, your plans just won't do,
"So we've got a brand new timetable for you!"
And as Rumsfeld retired and crept into the night
The Amendments cried out "Have a good secret flight!"

From the distance they heard him reply with a snort.
"Bye-bye, Rummy!" they answered, "we'll see you in court!"
Uncle Sam rode the chimney up out of the room
And, like Frosty, he said "I'll be back again soon."

But they heard him exclaim "Oh, and just one more thing!
"This year, when the holiday bells start to ring,
"Try to honor religion. Honest faith can't be wrong.
"It's America, can't we all just get along?

"So, on Christian," he cried, "Muslim, Hindu, and Jew!
"On Quaker! On Shaker! And Atheist too!
"On Buddhist! On Taoist! And to show we're not chickens "We'll file a
few lawsuits defending the Wiccans!

"Your belief is your right, so get out there and savor it.
"Uncle Sam's not a preacher, and he doesn't play favorites!"
So this holiday season, whatever you do,
Warmest wishes for Freedom, from the ACLU.
Nothing in the world is more yielding and gentle than water. Yet it has no equal for conquering the resistant and tough. The flexible can overcome the unbending; the soft can overcome the hard. - Lao Tse
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Old 12-20-2006   #27
Georgia Moonshine
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 173
Pot Prices will double. What you hippies gonna do?

BTW, if this is a genetically modified crop, does that mean that you crunchy-granola types in your organic Che Guevara tee shirts will not smoke it? LOLOLOLOLOL
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Old 12-20-2006   #28
Georgia Moonshine
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 173
Spoof? How about a Fable:


The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed.

The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.



The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed.

A social worker finds the shivering grasshopper, calls a press conference and demands to know why the squirrel should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like the grasshopper, are cold and starving. CNN shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper; with cuts to a video of the squirrel in his comfortable warm home with a table laden with food.

The press inform people that they should be ashamed that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so while others have plenty. The Deomcrat Party, Greenpeace, Animal Rights and the ACLU demonstrate in front of the squirrel's house. CNN, interrupting a cultural festival special from Portland with breaking news, broadcasts a multi cultural choir singing "We Shall Overcome". The talking heads on CNN say that the squirrel has got rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the squirrel to make him pay his "fair share" and increases the charge for squirrels to enter Washington DC.

In response to pressure from the media, the Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The squirrel' s taxes are reassessed. He is taken to court and fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as builders for the work he was doing on his home and an additional fine for contempt when he told the court the grasshopper did not want to work.

The grasshopper is provided with a public housing, financial aid to furnish it and an account with a local taxi firm to ensure he can be socially mobile.

The squirrels food is seized and re distributed to the more needy members of society, in this case the grasshopper.

Without enough money to buy more food, to pay the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, the squirrel has to downsize and start building a new home. The local authority takes over his old home and utilises it as a temporary home for asylum seeking cats who had hijacked a plane to get to the US as they had to share their country of origin with mice. On arrival they have tried to blow up the airport because of America's apparent love of dogs.

The cats had been arrested for the international offense of hijacking and attempt bombing but were immediately released because the police fed them kibble instead of salmon while in custody. Initial moves to then return them to their own country were abandoned because it was
feared they would face death by the mice. The cats devise and start a scam to obtain money from peoples credit cards.

A 60 Minutes special shows the grasshopper finishing up the last of the squirrel’s food, though Spring is still months away, while the public housing he is in, crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to maintain the house. He is shown to be taking drugs. Inadequate government funding is blamed for the grasshoppers drug 'illness'.

The cats seek recompense in the American courts for their treatment since arrival.

The grasshopper gets arrested for stabbing an old dog during a burglary to get money for his drugs habit. He is imprisoned but released immediately because he has been in custody for a few weeks. He is placed in the care of the probation service to monitor and supervise him. Within a few weeks he has killed a guinea pig in a botched robbery.

A blue ribbon panel, that will eventually cost $10,000,000 and state the obvious, is set up.

Additional money is put into funding a drug rehabilitation scheme for grasshoppers and legal aid for lawyers representing asylum seekers is increased.

The asylum seeking cats are praised by the government for enriching America's multicultural diversity and dogs are criticised by the government for failing to befriend the cats.

The grasshopper dies of a drug overdose. The usual sections of the press blame it on the obvious failure of government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity and his traumatic experience of prison. They call for the resignation of a cabinet head.

The cats are paid a million dollars each because their rights were infringed when the government failed to inform them there were mice in the United States.

The squirrel, the dogs and the victims of the hijacking, the bombing, the burglaries and robberies have to pay an additional percentage on their credit cards to cover losses. Their taxes are increased to pay for law and order and they are told that they will have to work beyond
65 because of a shortfall in government funds.

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Old 12-20-2006   #29
pnw, Washington
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 3,404
I have removed this as a sticky. It was intended as a list of essays worth your time. People arent using it that way.
"Yesterday I was clever and tried to change the world. Today I am wise and try to change myself." -Rumi
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Old 12-21-2006   #30
Georgia Moonshine
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 173

Sandy "Pants" Berger in the news again.

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