No, Alex, you suck at pretty much everything

But you're a beginner.
All I can say are basic fundamentals for the most part:
Keep your head and shoulders forward, the more the better.
Learn to make every paddle stroke vertical, and take the blade out before it reaches your hips. Never stop paddling in a rapid.
Keep your head when you're upside down. You can't learn to roll without first learning not to panic when you're upside down in a rapid. The mental drill is key. Do drills on flatwater/pools/lakes to be comfortable sitting upside down for stretches of time (10, 20, even 30 seconds) before you attempt a roll.
Repetition and drilling helps a lot.