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Old 06-07-2012   #31
OlyPen, Washington
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 85
There once was a woman named Cori
Who saw a blond hunk on the shore-i.
She thought, "I must seek
Out this guy by the creek."
So she posted on MBuzz her story.

But there came an interesting twist
To this case of Connections Missed:
Other men sent replies
Claiming they were the guys;
They would take her to lunch if she wished.

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Old 06-07-2012   #32
smauk2's Avatar
Near water (hopefully), Colorado
Paddling Since: 2008
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 770
Originally Posted by IamCori View Post
I love your guy's spirit!! You little go-getters.

Alright, so in the event you may recognize this description; white/blonde hair, green kayak, tan, blue eyes, muscular-but not stocky, drives a truck, dog lover; but did not have one with him....umm..that is not much to work with, is it? :/

For the record; I don't discriminate against could I? I am one.
This thread is golden. It totally might be me! Although I have brown hair, sometimes it looks blond because I'm tan like Conan The Barbarian, but way skinnier. Like if you see me on the river hook me up with a sandwich, I'm always hungry. Sooo I might not have blue eyes, but the reflection of the river might have altered the shade of them briefly.

I'm going to be honest, I paddle a pink Nemisis. I don't really have an explanation for how it might have appeared green, but sometimes when I loop it people forget what color it is and just want to admire my awesome carping rolls as I flush out of the feature.

I drive an old dirty golden Camry, but when I have all my gear loaded on it one might mistake it for a truck. The amount of stuff I have packed into the back seats might fool someone. People generally have to sift through mountains of Wendy's bags and clipped toenails if they want a shuttle.

I'm smart! E=MC^2 That equation explains why my boof defies the laws of gravity.

Finally, and the only description that actually fits me at all, is being a dog lover. Typing that sentence felt weird. I just want to clarify I love dogs like a kayaker loves PBR after spending three days boating through a canyon.

I look kind of like this.

Just imagine all that muscle packed onto my 5'9" frame.

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Old 06-07-2012   #33
hojo's Avatar
Lakewood, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1989
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,234
Originally Posted by smauk2 View Post

I'm smart! E=MC^2 That equation explains why my boof defies the laws of gravity.
Your Boof is Gay | Xtranormal

Though, I can tell you it wasn't me. I don't hang out in play parks. I rock the lakes.
On the river, I can abandon who I am and what I've done. However brief it lasts, while on the river I am nothing important and everything insignificant. I am flotsam, and happy to be so.
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Old 06-07-2012   #34
wheretheriverflows's Avatar
Denver, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2004
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 82
Im sorry, tears are rolling down my face...
two lines:
Women flock to me like cows to a bulll in September - Im the cassanova of boof, my boof is so badass!
And my favorite:
Sara is only married to you because of that bet she lost with you! You are crazy.
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Old 06-07-2012   #35
GoodTimes's Avatar
Eagle, Idaho
Paddling Since: '78
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 794
This thread is classic...haven't laughed this much while visiting the Buzz in awhile.

Somebody's gotta find this guy!!! What I wouldn't have given for something like this to happen to me 10 years ago. I hung out at the damn play park for days, weeks, months, no avail. Although I did come up with some catchy lyrics for a song while I was hanging around....."I'm sexy and I know it..." Don't know whatever happened with the rest of the song.

Maybe it's because I was at the Pueblo playpark????

Aggghhh, but alas...there was my river goddess surfing the third wave in the park as I approached....we're married now.
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Old 06-07-2012   #36
JDHOG72's Avatar
Wolcott, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2006
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 432
I am a boofing prodigy and my pink punk rocker was so boof on pyrite was gay but in general my boof is badass and at least I dont have dudes running my magic hot dog! Women do flock to me but unfortunatly for them it is true that my wife lost that bet.
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Old 06-08-2012   #37
Dipshit with the most.
carvedog's Avatar
Bellevue, Idaho
Paddling Since: 1991
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 2,496
Originally Posted by mountainjah View Post
and now a haiku for Cori,

riverside maiden
intoxicating surf stud
do not kill her buzz

...this thread's destined for the Hall
I love haiku and other japanese dishes like General's Chicken. This was beautiful man.

I cried
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Old 06-08-2012   #38
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Summit County, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2006
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 435
Don't tell anyone but I will admit I like a good chick flick from time to time and now I have this ultimate kayaking chick flick! Ha ha, this is one of the best threads this year.
But seriously Cori we need more details on this guy if your going to find him.
If this guy doesn't see this on the Buzz in the next week or two.....he's not worth having cause he apparently isn't a Buzzard!
And lastly, unless you want to be in the spank bank of every dirt bag kayaker from here to the Grand Canyon I wouldn't post bikini pics on here! Ha ha....I just step in front of a huge bullet with my fellow single kayaker friends!
Peace out bitches,
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Old 06-08-2012   #39
Denver, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2004
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 3,097
Cori, you have made a great choice. Kayakers are typically great people, and you obviously know a badass when you see one. Kayakers are especially fun to hang out with when there is no water or when it's not a powder day. You already possess two attributes most kayakers love... A bikini and lounging by the river while kayakers paddle. Do you like scenic drives on beautiful mountain roads? If the answer is yes, you just might be qualified to be the next Ms. Kayak.

I'd advise you to go back to golden, bring the bikini, and an ice chest of cold beer. Kayakers can detect the smell of cold beer from miles away. You might want to put up a little sign like "kayak stud docking, no gapers" next to the river to let Mr Right know you mean business.
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Old 06-08-2012   #40
Idaho Springs, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2005
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 189
this thread rocks...i've had a solid 1/2 hour of laughter reading through this at work! Hell, I didn't even know craigslist had a missed love connections section. But like KSC i guess i never miss so i don't have to worry about it.

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