Ohhh donster the front range monster!
I would rather be a little boy than silly little old man sitting behind your computer wishing you could paddle as well as my dog!! People like you are really what kayaking is all about, a bunch of assholes who think their shit don't stink, claim to be paddlers, but just pose hard as fuck. I am a shit stain in the whitewater bible and there is nothing you can do about it, "Don't fuck with Jesus"-Big L. MUAHAHMUAAHAMUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
The truth be told, the most fun I have EVER had kayaking is hanging out with my best friends totally unsponsored without a care in the world. I had way more fun fucking with all of you douche bags and getting "kicked" off the team than I ever did worrying what people thought of me as a pro athlete. The truth is white water paddling is a bunch of starving companies playing into a market that 99% of the general public is scared to death of. When the companies are barely scraping by how do you think they treat their "pro" athletes? Like a dirty shit rag! Hey kid how about this, you risk you neck and look totally badass in my gear while making videos and you can have some free shit that I just had made in china! Good deal right? Well been there done that and now I just have a kick ass time where ever I go! I have a real job where I can buy whatever gear I want to wear or boat I want to paddle! I also do not sit in a cubicle every day wanking it to Bombflow! Imagine that!
Now I have badass gear that doesn't leak like a sieve(Sweet's dry tops kick ass thanks Jakub) a really fun kayak(thanks Jackson Rockstar you make my world go round) and a sick ass paddle(Thanks Ben Lockard of Silex Woodworks in Ouray CO). I am out there shredding like never before NO thanks to my shitty sponsors that didn't even have the balls to get my back in a internet brawl with some front rangers and their mail order brides. So long story short, thank you front range douche bags for your rage and jealousy that has forever made my life complete. So if you actually kayak I will see you around but for the other 99% of people on this forum IF YOU WANNA HATE go ahead cause it stokes me out!!!
Moose shit don't stank, PEACE!