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Old 08-25-2005   #11
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Local, Colorado
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RiverWrangler eats babies.
Livingston - THAT was funny!!!

Dempsey - I'm managing the Diamond Cabaret in Denver and opening a crack cartel. Soon enough I'll be driving a Bentley with a 20-person entourage. Watch out.

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Old 08-25-2005   #12
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Thought-criminal, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2000
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Posts: 989
I think a dingo ate your baby.

How do you get 10 raft guides into a closet?
Tell them they can live there for free.

How do you get them out again?
Tell them they have to keep it clean.

Rafts carry beer AND hot girls that don't kayak. I'm all for both. You dudes that are too hard to like rafts can spank the monkey with your greasy granpappy and drink the schnapster. Don't get me wrong...I wouldn't ride in one...well, unless there was a lot of flat water to cross...then I'd tie my boat on and hop in and enjoy the orgy! Rafts have orgies, right?

I hope in the future Americans are thought of as a warlike, vicious people, because I bet a lot of high schools would pick "Americans" as their mascot. -Jack Handy
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Old 08-25-2005   #13
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Rafts carry beer AND hot girls that don't kayak. I'm all for both.
BastardSonOfElvis: 10 points. Hot chicks are cool, and beer makes them hotter.

I'd rather self support with some Wild Turkey in a place where rafts can't go
RiverWrangler: -5 points. Have fun with a bottle bouncing around in your boat. Where are you going to carry your sleeping bag, tarp, and disco ball?

Actually I don care what you do as long as you truly love and show respect for the river, unless you're a rafter.
RiverWrangler: 2 points. You redeemed yourself a little.
Overall score: -3 points.

I am a rafter and a kayaker, so I hate everyone equally, right Bizzle?
WhiteLightning: -5 points for admitting to being a rafter. +5 points for being a kayaker. Make up your mind, damn it!

Now any kayaker that has been on a multiday trip can attest to the fact that rafts are your friends. They carry your beer. Nuff said.
PhilBob: +10 points. Everyone likes to make fun of rafters until they're carrying all your shit, your friend's shit, the booze, beer, food, and the ladies. Well done.

God I'm bored.
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Old 08-25-2005   #14
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Denver, Colorado
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BSOE masturbates to Christo and voted for Bush.
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Old 08-25-2005   #15
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P. Bizzy: -20 points for talking shit about the whiskey. if you don't like wild turkey i don like u. and if u ever self support the shit with me i ain't sharin' my whiskey with u either. maybe you can drink some if you bring the disco ball and the hotties.

for the record - i don't eat babies
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Old 08-25-2005   #16
Join Date: Aug 2005
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Masterbating to Christo, that's classic.

How many kayakers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

7. 1 to screw the light bulb, and 6 to talk about how gnarly the hole was. zing.
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Old 08-25-2005   #17
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Eagle, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1994
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The only problem I have with tubers are the ones w/o PFDs and helmets and the outposts that let them get away with that shit.

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Old 08-25-2005   #18
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Laramie, Wyoming
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Livingston is a communist goat fucker who swims in class II
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Old 08-25-2005   #19
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Summit, Colorado
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I HATE STUPID PEOPLE! I give everyone shit because that's what makes it fun. But I still like the rafters who carry my gear and anyone who's completely and totally committed to whatever they do. I don't care what craft you're in, I like you as long as you're not an idiot, unless you're from Texas (hot girls exempt).
"The world would be a better place if everyone kayaked."-Brad Ludden (Valhalla)
"You only get one chance to run a drop blind."-DD
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Old 08-25-2005   #20
Charc in = charc out
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Seattle, Washington
Paddling Since: 1992
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 475
Mmkay .. let's be clear, & honest here, mmkay? The issue is not so much with the "rafters" (i.e., tourons from Oklahoma & Aurora), but with the guides. With 15 yrs of involvement of one sort or another in "the industry", I've managed to find only a handful of raftguides that I can tolerate .. let alone "like". Note: the ones that I do like, I tend to like a whole lot .. but by & large, you commercial guides are a buncha goons in "wacky" shirts & chacos. It's true -- accept & move on.

Now let's be fair .. proportionally, there's an assload of no-style kayakers who try too hard, who never know when to shut their dick-washers, & who are capable of breathtaking displays of douche-baggery (Hey A-hole, I'm looking at you) .. I've spent the same 15 yrs defending myself & my chosen hobby against shit talkin' from my non-boater friends ..

whatever that all means ...

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