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Old 11-05-2012   #31
BV, Colorado
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 56
I've bought three tents, but never owned one - all replacements to the owners...two blew into the river, one was buried so deep I thought I lost it only to find it late in the trip covered in mold...

Back in the day, I broke the lantern glass on night 1 of 18 - no replacement glass...

During a challenging cooking session, I threw some bacon grease into the river - it coagulated all over my friends drag bag. Thus his oar grips became slippery...resulting in a dynamic flip before the V wave...

Me and a girlfriend were doing deeds in a little pool/grotto above camp. Came back down to find the crew pumping water fed from same pool/grotto...

Could go on and on...too many to list...funny post!

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Old 11-05-2012   #32
Dave Frank's Avatar
Boulder, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1995
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 2,727
I used to store all my river gear in a the 12' cargo trailer that I am finally selling. It was great, you just hook it up and go to the river. All my river gear would be in it and I could decide at the ramp what all was coming on the float.

One day I embarked for a Westy with only one rider and figured I'd load the raft in the pick up and leave the trailer at home.

When I got to setting the boat up I was missing one piece of gear: the frame.

As much as he wanted to, Kyler couldn't find find any regulation prohibiting launching without one, so off we went with a pile off loosely tied gear and the boat Jury-rigged as a sweeper set up. No big surprise, but did not perform well like this.

I knew I had a friend coming down from the upper canyon who would be stoked to pass of all his gear and frame on to my boat so he could paddle guide his. Fortunately this came to fruition. As a bonus, I got to use the de-rigged boat as a sleeping pad.


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Old 11-05-2012   #33
colorado_steve's Avatar
Paddling Since: 2002
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 284
2 years ago the lower dolores was very windy. we took off from bradfield bridge on a 2 day trip down to the dove creek pump house. when we got to camp that afternoon the wind was really starting to pick up. when we were unloading boats a 30' pine was blown off the top of the canyon and fell all the way to the river landing across from us (pretty cool to watch). This was going to be my first trip with an umbrella for shade on the boat, but i could not use it much due to the wind. The umbrella was standing in its holder on my boat but not open when a HUGE wind gust came through the canyon flipping a lightly loaded paddle boat onto my heavier gear boat. Snapped my umbrella in half and threw pfd's into the river and trees nearby. I was pretty bummed about the umbrella as it was brand spankin new
Oh! I don't take it lightly! I've always got to know
There's an old lion a roarin' n the river down below
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Old 11-05-2012   #34
The Mogur's Avatar
Oregon City, Oregon
Paddling Since: 1972
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 457
Avoid reading this one if you have eaten recently or plan to do so in the immediate future (like anytime in the next week).

I was leading a Rogue trip for a group from Seattle, and I had a rookie guide named Stanley running a 14-foot gear boat. In camp at Mule Creek on our third night out, one of our guests, Rita, was drinking a soda from a private stash that she had brought along. In the kitchen area, as we were wrapping up the dinner dish line, Rita took a swig from her soda can and immediately threw up all over the beach as she rushed to the riverbank.

The third guide, Alan, and I ran to her aid, along with a couple other guests, as she heaved into the water. Once she had ejected everything from her stomach (a cachew chicken stir-fry, as I recall), Rita began to feel a little bit better. She said that something vile had gotten into her soda. Now, I have seen yellow jackets go into beverage cans, but that seemed an unlikely explanation. So I walked back to see what had happened.

I found a soda can that was nearly empty sitting on the sand next to the chair where Rita had eaten dinner. I poured it out and found nothing in it but Sprite. Just as I was starting to believe that she must have swallowed an adventurous slug, I spotted Stanley carrying another Sprite can. He seemed to be heading out of camp, up in the direction of the outhouses. I asked him about the Sprite, because I knew that he hadnt brought any along.

He stammered and looked evasive as he tried to tell me that Rita had given him one. All the while, he was trying to keep the can out of my view. When I made him show it to me, everything became clear. He had been using chewing tobacco, and had grabbed the empty can to spit in. Rita had the profound misfortune to pick up the wrong Sprite can.

If there had been any way to throw him out of camp right there, Id have done it. I told him not to use me as a reference if he tried to get a job as a guide with any other outfitter. Then I told Rita that it must have been something like a slug in her soda, and I told her that she could take her next trip with us at no charge. Believe it or not, she actually did come back for another trip. Stanley did not.
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Old 11-05-2012   #35
Dave Frank's Avatar
Boulder, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1995
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 2,727
Here's another poop one:

No Groover

You guessed it, the Red trailer was involved in this snafu as well. On a MFS trip in ’04, the Red Trailer hauled most of the gear to Idaho. My groover lived in the trailer, but someone else had brought theirs too. While checking in the day before, I showed the Rangerette the required gear, including my eco-safe system, still in the trailer. Further discussion of whose was to come on the river never happened.

While setting up camp at Sheepeater, someone hurriedly opened every rocket box on the trip only to discover that none were intended to receive the brown.

After a quick discussion and some finger pointing, someone’s box got downgraded from charcoal to poop. No seat. Groover name fully understood by all.

Two days later, despite solid efforts with the stick tamper, the first box started to reach capacity. As we were setting up gear at Cow camp, we discovered someone’s forgotten lunch pit stop: a rocket box with a home made wooden seat and only one fresh deposit. Not many groups would have been nearly as pleased to find someone else’s $hit in camp, so it was definitely win win.

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Old 11-05-2012   #36
Woodland Park, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1999
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 127
I finally got my first real raft this summer and a buddy and I took it out on Cataract. Great trip, handled the talked perfectly. Leading up to the confluence we planned the trip around the full moon so we could make better time through the night without a motor. Around 11 that night the whiskey Camelot big time. My buddy took a turn rowing for a couple hours and I figured there wasn't anything he could hit so I kept right on drinking. After a few he asks me if the moon was in the right place. I startling around at some familiar surroundings and realize he had been rowing upriver for two hours! Not really epic but funny as all hell.
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Old 11-05-2012   #37
West By God, Wyoming
Paddling Since: 1999
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 289
On the 3rd day of a Middle Fork trip, we stopped for an impromptu safety meeting. A kayaker friend paddled up to my raft and grabbed onto the side. After discussing safety for ten minutes or so, we decided to head downstream. My friend that was in his kayak asked me to hand him his paddle. Only thing was that he had never actually put his paddle in the raft. I said I don't have his paddle, and he looks around and he didn't have it. Thank goodness we had a spare! We found his missing paddle later that day in the eddy below sunflower hot springs.
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Old 11-06-2012   #38
Avatard's Avatar
portland, Oregon
Paddling Since: 1991
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 2,188
Originally Posted by wildh2onriver
After loading up the flatbed at Diamond Creek, my friend put his rolled up new Hyside on top and somehow forgot to tie it down

His boat started out being a 14'3"...ended up with about 6' left.
If that was an Aire 143 i'd like to see how their no fault warrantee would have remedied the situation
Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it "guaranteed", I will. I got spare time.
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Old 11-06-2012   #39
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Seattle, Washington
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 365
Some pretty clear fault in that sitch!
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Old 11-06-2012   #40
Avatard's Avatar
portland, Oregon
Paddling Since: 1991
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 2,188
Originally Posted by slickhorn
Some pretty clear fault in that sitch!
Shouldnt matter right? If its your fault you pay the freight

Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it "guaranteed", I will. I got spare time.
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