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Old 03-14-2008   #1
Gary E's Avatar
Jackson, Wyoming
Paddling Since: 94
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 739
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chunderboy rants

The Beginning
As of 5/27 the Steamboat Play hole is for locals only-front range paddlers come up here at your own risk! No howlies-you guys are barnyard bra
Chunderboy Dials The Dowd
Hey brahs, Just thought I'd like to let you in on the radest shait ever, just yesterday some bros and myself dialed Dowd Chute at what I was told is a super gnarly level. The locals couldn't believe it- they where all to chicken shait to put on- they just stood there gapping like a bunch of choads while we got her done. My one buddy Elmer swam the top falls, but other then that you could say we greased it- next stop Lower Mish! It just shows that the Chunderboy is stepin' it up this season- kickin' but and takin' names! There was a strainer at mile two, but luckily, we were able to eddy out above it to avoid what would have been a pretty bad scene. Keep it safe and keep it local! Long live the Chunderboy, and death to all those player haters out there- and oh yeh to all you chumps that said Dowd was too high- ya'll are worthless and weak! See ya, wouldn't want to be ya, biatch!!!-CB
Chunderboy:On Canadians
Listen to me and listen good you Canadian sack of shit! How dare you insinuate that I, the Chunderboy, would ever live on the Front Range amongst the hordes of asswipes and douche bags I so animatedly detest! What's the matter brah, still upset over Patrick Roy leaving your lame ass country for the greener pastures of Colorado? You even know who your talking to biatch? I heard it was your ass on the end of Corry's kirk in his big motion picture debut. Heard you took that money shot like a real pro- So don't you even think of talking your low-grade crap around these parts! Your Canadian trash brah, with your silly lil' French accent- your Brian Adams and Loverboy CDs! I bet you wear your sunglasses at night- bet you think Corey Hart is the man- this is the type of lame ass shit that passes for culture up north, and your stupid ass is too dumb to know the difference. Here's some food for thought for ya', something you can mull over while your sittin' back watching Degrassi High and fingering your overworked bung hole- We, and when I say we I mean America- the home of the free, land of the brave- one day will march up across the boarder and pull the rug out from under you. We will drill in your mountains, pillage your homes, #### your women and there ain't a god damn thing you sorry ass bastards will be able to do about it! So enjoy it while you got it loser, and if I may be so bold as to quote my late friend Charlie Beavers- "You all are just a bunch of temporary bitches" -Don't forget it brah, word to ya' mother!
Chunderboy: On Frontrangers
What's up biatches? You sorry ass bastards make me ashamed to call Colorado home- with your crap ass taste in music,(John Denver), and your even crapper taste in entertainment- the Donkeys, AKA AFC swag. Chunderboy challenged you losers and as he expected no one had the guts to answer the call, with the exception of my Glenwood homies, my hats of to you guys! As far as all you front rangers go I've said about all there is to say about what a sorry bunch of 9-5 butt-lickers you guys are! As for Hobie and his GNC enhanced crew- all I can say is Vail still sucks, and Steamboat still rules! I'm sure you steroid lovin', I 70 livin', creek boat paddlin' douche bags have your reasons for stayin' home- after all, if I was a hack, (which we all know I am not), I too would be weary of 1,200 CFS comin' down the knarliest rapids the Colorado has to offer. So while you front rangers and Vail choads are at home watching "Interior Motives" and dreamin' about Christopher Lowell, us real paddlers are out there doing what we do, paddling and gettin' her done. Me and some of my brahs will be at the takeout tomorrow at 11AM, anyone who thinks they are brah enough to join us come along, anyone who is not there will exposed as the lil' sally! Word to ya motha, biatches!


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Old 03-31-2014   #2
Boatin', Colorado
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 201
Been to serious and way too long since this good stuff was posted....

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Old 03-31-2014   #3
lmyers's Avatar
Buena Vista, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2005
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 4,207
Thanks Peev. I was just thinking it was time to bring back some of the quality posts MB has been lacking in lately. Might have to dig up a few gems myself...
GARNA’s mission is to foster stewardship of the resources of the greater Arkansas River region through education, volunteerism and experiences.
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Old 03-31-2014   #4
k2andcannoli's Avatar
Denver, Colorado
Paddling Since: 2002
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 657
Snow melt boating sucks anyway... I nd to get back to greener pastures
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Old 03-31-2014   #5
swimteam101's Avatar
Steamboat, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1997
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 329

Hard to believe its been almost a decade.
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Old 03-31-2014   #6
Glen Vegas, Florida
Paddling Since: 92
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 338
Thanks for the bringing some of the Chunderboy posts to the front. I have gotten tired lately of all the posts about how many pairs of depends diapers one should bring on a San Juan trip. Or which raft will appreciate in value the most over twenty of storage in a Boulder garage.
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Old 04-01-2014   #7
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Phuoc My, Da Nang, THE 'NAM
Paddling Since: 1845
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,988
id like to hear what wayne chorter has to say
"Don't f$&@ing eddy out, just run it! Whaddya doin??" -LMyers
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Old 04-01-2014   #8
Lawrenceville, Georgia
Paddling Since: 2010
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 5
Chunderboy rants

Just read all of the Chunderboy rants that some of you have posted and I literally can't stop laughing.
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Old 04-01-2014   #9
Avon, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1997
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 471
Thanks Gary...much needed. I still love the Cross Mountain one with the Rangers. And the Cross Creek vs. the Eagle County boaters. Funny.

Long live Chunder
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Old 04-01-2014   #10
duct tape's Avatar
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Paddling Since: 1974
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 642
From the Wayne Chorter post:

"Piedra (spanish for old man's piss)"


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